Loving people has been one of the most beautiful yet grueling rides I’ve ever been on.
I loved you Dad, before I knew what love was and it wasn’t safe.
I loved you boy; I loved you girl, before I loved myself & I guess that was infatuation.
I loved you friend, with hopes of futures and growing pains of transition.
I loved you best friend, even though love isn’t always enough to keep people close.
I loved you family, before I knew you’d rip my heart out and sew it back together, depending on the year.
I loved you son, enough to sacrifice my heart.
I loved you partner, yesterday with all my heart. And I love you today, for the rest of tomorrows.
I loved you conditionally and from a distance.
I loved you close-up and personal.
I loved you vulnerably and with raw authenticity.
And all these loves have proven over again the fragile nature of humans: how our hearts break; how we destroy others in the destruction of ourselves; how love binds us together and keeps us alive. Love may not be appealing to some. It’s not always on my to-do list either if I’m straight with you. But on this gut-wrenching ride of love, connection, and beautifully messy life I’m learning the risk, the heartbreak, is worth the lesson.
Love is worth the grief.
Love is worth the work.
Love is worth the tears.
Love is worth it.
Be gentle with yourself my friend.
© Ange Neil 2018